You like my dress? I skinned it myself.
Wow, you make Jon Gosselin look like Ron Jeremy.
Your little brother is so cool. Let's bring him along!
I know I said Dutch, but let's have you go ahead and pay for everything.
Hi, I'm your blind date . . . you can just call me Mr. Polanski.
Do you care if my dad, Michael J. Fox, pins your boutonniere?
My alcohol hook-up didn't come through, but I got us a case of Sunny D!
Oh, you thought I was a girl?
The flowers are courtesy of FTD, the rash on my junk from STD.
I thought YOU were bringing the condoms!
I know I parked far away. But this way, no one will hear your rape whistle.
This will be fun . . . you're like the only guy in school I haven't slept with.
Tonight's band is Great White.
Did you know I led the league in sacks when I was playing for the '86 Giants?
Sorry, I got totally baked and ate your corsage.
I've never done it with a girl before, just lots of boys.
Before dinner, can we swing by a hospital? I'm starting to crest.
This video is gonna KILL on YouPorn.
Screw this stupid dance, let's go see "Letters to Juliet"!
Before we go to the dance, I need to swing by the slaughterhouse to pick up a
bucket of pig blood.
Can we stop at the drugstore? My Valtrex prescription is ready.
I know I caught you off-guard, but I figured, why can't guys wear prom dresses, too?
Thanks for going to the prom with me. It was hard to find a date, what with all the
You got a good chance of getting lucky with me . . . after I do the football team.